A Call for Help

Dear reader,

This month, in order to address a more nuanced topic, taxes, we decided to format our Health Tip in the old “Ann Landers” letter approach. Hope you enjoy!

Dear Dan Landers,

Our basement stinks since the flooding, my mother-in-law can’t remember my name, and since she started wandering, the neighbors have been looking at us funny. I know you can’t help us with the basement, but I was hoping you might have some insight into the mother-in-law situation.

She came to live with us when she turned 80. At that time, she could take care of herself, and even though she was getting forgetful, she liked joking with me, and she would sometimes help out around the house. In the past five years, though, she’s deteriorated into an argumentative accident waiting to happen. Lately we’ve caught her at all hours of the day or night trying to climb out her basement window. She’s still pretty strong for 85, and her language is stronger when we try to stop her.

You don’t want to hear about when we tell her it’s time to get a shower.

We’ve had several unexpected expenses in the past few years. Insurance mostly covered the new roof that happened after those March storms a couple years ago, but then the AC went out, the fridge stopped working and our son decided to go on to grad school. We were blessed to be able to let Mom live with us, but I’m just wondering if I can swing all this, especially if Mom ends up needing extra care.

Can you think of anything that can help?

Frazzled Fred

Dear Fred,

You may be frazzled, but you have my utmost respect in how you’re honoring your mother-in-law.

The flooding that stunk up your basement sounds like trouble, and I would advise checking with your insurance and ruling out mold. That would be step one in getting everyone feeling better.

By the way, that same flooding has extended the tax deadline in Tennessee to November, so let’s talk about taxes, if not for this year, then for the future.

First, are you claiming your mother-in-law as a dependent? You might be able to do this if:

• you have provided more than half of her financial support for the year, including food, housing, transportation, etc.;

• no one else is claiming her as a dependent;

• her gross income doesn’t exceed the allowable amount for that year;

• she is a legal U.S. citizen, U.S. resident alien, U.S. national, or a resident of Canada or Mexico.

Next, make sure to list all medical expenses you’ve incurred for her care the year. Once those expenses pass a certain threshold, they are eligible to provide a significant benefit.

Finally, as things progress and you have to make decisions about care, keep in mind that hiring an individual rather than going through an agency like Cura for Care means that you’ll be considered a “household employer,” which means you’ll be responsible for paying their unemployment, Medicare and Social Security taxes. You’ll want to keep meticulous records.

Hiring someone through an agency like Cura for Care will eliminate this tax load, as well as allow you to keep your mother-in-law living at home for a bit longer while still providing you some respite and peace of mind.

You have my deepest respect as you navigate this path.

Best wishes,

Dan Landers